The Chemistry of Communication
A white elephant is a rare white or light-gray Asian elephant that is revered in parts of Southeast Asia and India. In Siam (present-day Thailand) there are stories about the ancient practice whereby kings gave white elephants as gifts to members of the royal court.
When a king wanted to reward a loyal subject and elevate their status in the kingdom he would provide a gift of a white elephant. Because they were sacred, white elephants could not be used as draft animals and the owner incurred a significant expense to care for them with little tangible benefit in return. For these favored subjects, the king would not only give them the white elephant, but he would also provide the means to feed and care for the animal.
It is said that if the king wanted to destroy a member of his own court who had fallen out of favor for one reason or another, he would also present that person with a white elephant. However in this case, the gift would not come with a land grant or financial support to cover the costs of caring for the animal. Because they could not reject the gift, the overwhelming burden to the recipient would likely ruin them financially and in so doing, indirectly exact the king’s wish.
Has your boss or a colleague ever given you a white elephant? When is an assignment just an assignment? When is a gesture just a gesture? When are words just words? When does a speech act mean one thing in a certain context and yet something quite different in another? Understanding the chemistry of communication provides a key to answering these questions. For example, take these words, spoken by one colleague to another: “We need to talk? I have a few things I want to discuss.”
Are these just words? Is this a simple, odorless, and colorless transaction of information intended to set up a meeting? Both colleagues may indeed perceive it in these simple terms. However, considering the rich chemistry of communication it is likely that more than an invitation gets made by this interaction.
Understanding what makes patterns of communication and interaction requires knowledge of the composition, properties, and behavior of basic communication elements. The chemistry of communication includes a variety of primary, bonding, and background elements that combine to make the various patterns of interaction we engage in. Dissecting common communication exchanges can reveal the subtle ways those elemental building blocks of communication mix together to create complex and unique outcomes.
